


"My Odan"

by helenkacan



Category: Star Trek: The Next Generation
Genre: Alien Biology, Alien Character(s), Alien Culture, Alien Sex, Caring, Community: lgbtfest, F/F, First Time, Interspecies Romance, LGBTQ Themes, Light-Hearted, Seduction, Symbionts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-19
Updated: 2014-07-19
Packaged: 2018-02-09 13:06:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,999
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1984098
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/helenkacan/pseuds/helenkacan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Prompt:  757.  Star Trek: The Next Generation: Beverly Crusher/Kareel Odan.  How would Beverly have to adapt and change, unexpectedly being in a same sex relationship for the first time?</p>
            </blockquote>





	"My Odan"

**Author's Note:**

> Timeline: Begins shortly after the end of the episode _The Host_ , S4x23.  
> This story is a continuation of the previous story/prompt from the Fest in [Risking All For Love](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1983903).

The unfamiliar thrum of the engines of the Trill ship has woken me up. For a moment, I'm lost in the darkness before the memories come flooding back, grounding me, reminding me where I am.

Kareel's bed.

Or, to be precise, Kareel Odan's bed.

I still can't believe I'm here, leaving the Enterprise to continue on its journey. Well, not permanently. But that's a story in itself.

~ :: ~

When I'd asked the computer about the location of Kareel, I learned that she was in the Observation Lounge.

Running a quick brush through my hair and trying to even out my breathing, I made my way there. I wasn't surprised to find that Kareel wasn't alone. Still, I entered and paid no attention to some of the senior staff assembled around the table. I slid into the empty chair next to Kareel and as nonchalantly as possible placed the red rose in front of her. I heard a quiet, sharp, intake of breath from her as her eyes grew wide. And then there was the barest hint of a nod and a calm smile.

Of course, the Captain had turned to me. “Ah, Dr. Crusher, I'm pleased you were able to join us. The Ambassador was just telling us how thorough and caring you were in prolonging and saving Odan's life.”

All eyes were focused on me. I'm sure that was a definite smirk on Deanna's face. One of Will's eyebrows was arched. I was surprised to see he was awake and up. But, then, this was the Ambassador. And poor Data merely looked puzzled. All presumably because of the rose. But I didn't care. I'd done exactly what was needed. Wanted. There was no room for embarrassment.

I'd explained away my lateness by referring to updating my medical logs, not wanting to forget anything important about the procedures I'd carried out. I was a little surprised when Kareel took that as her cue to invite me to accompany her back to the Trill homeworld so that I could see for myself how symbiote and host interacted in their natural environment.

I'm not sure why, but Jean-Luc seemed to be flustered by the request. But even he could not give any reasonable explanation to refuse it, especially not when it was coming from such a respected source.

Of course, I understood exactly why Kareel had made it. After my professional curiosity had been satisfied, we would have time to get to know each other. I couldn't have done it aboard the Enterprise. Not with Deanna's empathic senses waiting to pounce on me from around every corner. She's an excellent Counselor, but I'd like to keep my feelings to myself, at least for the time being.

When the Captain said he was honoured to comply with the request, as long as I had no prior obligations, I nearly jumped out of my chair in my eagerness to leave. But I managed to restrain myself and made the appropriate polite response. When the meeting was over, I turned to Kareel and said I'd meet her at the docking bay. And only then did I rush to my quarters, quickly cramming a bag with some casual clothing, as well as a couple of scanners that I intended to modify. I was curious to see if I could evaluate the symbiote and host separately and then as a whole, and to know what was the ideal balance. I really was thrilled to get an opportunity to expand my database.

Before I knew it, I was being ushered aboard the smaller Trill ship. Kareel introduced me to the pilot-navigator, engineer and medical technician before leading me to her private quarters. She'd quirked an eyebrow before asking, “Is this alright with you, Doctor Beverly?”

I turned the question back upon her. “Is this alright with you, Ambassador?”

She smiled. “Please, just Kareel. Or Odan, if it makes you more comfortable. But I am overjoyed that you accepted my invitation. And for this gesture.” She was still carrying the rose I'd given her.

I took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “Kareel, I don't know where to begin. You already know that. But I believe I can show you that my intentions are sincere, even if a little late.” And, then, hoping that I'd made the correct assumption, I lifted her other hand up to my lips and pressed them gently to her wrist before lowering it and placing it over my beating heart.

Her smile dazzled me. And quelled my fears.

She led me to a couch and I sat down with her.

“I hope we can tempt you with some of our cuisine, though it may be unfamiliar to you.”

I accepted a tartlet from her fingers. The fruit slices in it were yellow and orange, but the explosion of flavour upon my tongue was not citrusy. More like ripe plums and pears with a hint of cinnamon. When I'd gobbled it down, I licked my fingers clean, not at all ashamed for showing it. Kareel laughed, delighted that my first culinary experience had been pleasurable.

She also passed me a goblet with a spiral stem into which she poured a pale amber liquid. It was full of bubbles, especially concentrated within the twisted stem. I can't even begin to describe the taste. I took a hesitant sip and gasped. Then another and another until Kareel grasped my wrist to slow me down.

I giggled nervously and set the glass down on the low table in front of us.

Kareel set her own drink down and took my hands within hers. “Too much, too quickly, and you'll be sleeping for hours.” Her gaze grew impish. “And then where would I be, my dearest Beverly, waiting for you to open your eyes finally and see me.”

I was serious again. “I do see you, Kareel.”

She inclined her head, as if to ponder my statement. “Yes, I believe you do. But I also feel your lingering uncertainty. I know you weren't expecting to find Odan within me. So, what can I say to ease your mind? We have a little time before joining the crew for dinner.”

I breathed a sigh of relief that we weren't going to be left alone for the duration of the trip. I wriggled my hands free of hers but quickly stopped her frown from forming by holding them. “Kareel, you already know me from my time together with Odan. But I have never had a female lover. And I don't know anything at all about your experiences.”

Kareel smiled again, this time shyly. “My dearest Beverly. Here you may have to become the teacher because I have never had a lover before in my life, male or female.”

I was so shocked I dropped her hands. “I don't understand. You are so self-assured, so beautiful. Why ....” I couldn't finish. But she understood. I had said enough.

“It is our way. If we are to be joined, the hosts are prohibited from forming deep personal relationships, because the joining would change the nature of the relationship, sometimes in a disruptive or violent manner. Our ancestors learned this the hard way and made the necessary changes to the way our society functions. They also learned that hosts are not interchangeable. When you return to the Enterprise, talk to Will. I'm sure he'll tell you how difficult it was not to knock the two delegates' heads together when they were being so stubborn.”

I laughed. I knew what she was talking about. Will Riker preferred to be a man of action. “So, a part of the host is retained upon joining?”

Kareel smiled again. “Oh, yes. Did you think we were only mindless shells?”

I nodded. “I didn't know what to think, but it had crossed my mind.”

“So, it is timely that you are here with me on our way home.”

I still had some confused thoughts. “But, you're an adult already. Do all joinings take place at the same age?”

“No. Most of them happen to younger Trill. But some of us, based upon intense psychological assessment, are set apart because we are to become hosts to the oldest and wisest symbiotes. It is a great honour.”

I looked at her with a new respect and deep sympathy. “But a lonely life, too.”

“There have always been ways to ease the feelings of being separate, alone. Special teas, meditation, talking with our elders.”

I whispered, as if just coming to the same realisation. “But it's not the same as loving somebody.”

“No. I have only learned that.” There was a flash of a bittersweet smile.

My heart went out to her. I so wanted to cocoon and protect her – I who had rejected her earlier today! My voice was hesitant. “Kareel, do you trust me to be your first lover? Completely?”

She brought her hands up to cradle my face. “I know your heart, Beverly. And I give you my heart and my body, willingly.” And then she leaned in and kissed me. Not quite Odan. Certainly not Riker. But sweet, wise, patient Kareel.

I couldn't help myself and moaned, deepening the kiss. My arms embraced her and held onto her like an escape pod. Here, I'd wanted to protect her, but I was clinging to her as if afraid for my life if I let go. I was detached enough to know that my body was pulsing with hormones and pheromones. Even though I'd never given a single thought to being with a woman before in my life, I wanted _this_ woman. And she wanted me. I'd been so worried about _my_ feelings, _my_ fears but they evaporated into thin air.

I would have kept kissing her longer, but Kareel lifted her lips from mine, but stayed within the embrace, resting her forehead against mine. I could hear the sparkle in her voice.

“I think I know what we'll be doing more of after dinner. But the crew will be gathering shortly. Would you care to use the facilities?”

I nodded, grateful. I'm sure my cheeks were burning up. I grabbed one of my smaller bags and hurried in the direction she'd indicated. The image that greeted me in the mirror did not disappoint. There is an unmistakable glow ( _Deanna, go away!_ ) that is present on every woman's face, when she falls in love. Or else, the oxytocin was working on me at warp speed. I splashed some cold water to cool my face and brushed my hair. I added a quick sheen of gloss to my lips. After all, I was here officially as a representative of the Federation. Well, at least until dinner ended.

I followed Kareel to the crew's small dining facility. Here we were served by the chef who then joined us at the table. Kareel explained that Trill society tended to be egalitarian in nature. Not knowing who they would be joined with tended to burst inflated egos. I nodded, saying I wished we had a natural inhibitor like that on Earth.

I didn't speak much, but enjoyed listening. Even though Kareel had just been away from the ship for a few hours, Odan had a few weeks of catching up to do, so Kareel was reintegrating the symbiote with the latest news. Should I feel guilty that I took up all of Odan's free time while on board the Enterprise? No, I have no regrets and I don't think Odan does either. It's still all incredible to me: thinking of the symbiotes and hosts as individuals until they are merged into one being.

Once dinner was over, Kareel rose and I followed suit. We both thanked the chef for the excellent meal, even though I didn't recognise a bit of what I'd eaten.

Kareel reached out to hold my hand as we returned to her quarters. I gulped when we'd entered and she engaged the privacy lock.

Then she turned to me. “Would you feel more comfortable wearing something to bed?”

I gave out a nervous laugh. “Is that Kareel or Odan asking the question.”

“I think Kareel would feel more comfortable, but Odan is suggesting it.”

I smiled warmly. “Then I accept your excellent recommendation.” I was glad I'd packed one of those slinky nighties, the frivolous kind that should be of no use on a vessel as busy as the Enterprise. I pointed to her bathroom. “Should I change in there?”

Kareel nodded. “Just give me a few minutes first.”

She left me alone and I used the few minutes to examine my surroundings more closely. The quarters were impersonal and I gathered that this was an all-purpose short range transfer ship. Otherwise, the Ambassador would have had an official ship on standby still docked with the Enterprise.

I turned around, startled when Kareel came back. She was wearing a short, shimmery midnight blue gown, with an asymmetrical neckline leaving one arm bare, the other arm covered to the wrist.

She shrugged her shoulders. “I know it is an impracticality, but I'd always hoped to wear something lovely for my first time.”

“It's beautiful ... and you're breathtaking.” That was no lie. Perhaps there was _something_ new being awakened within me.

I saw her chest swell, as if she'd been too afraid to breathe, waiting for my reaction. I couldn't help but move forward to give her a kiss. I could feel her smile beneath my lips which curved up in response.

I stepped back and grasped the larger bag holding my clothing. “I won't be long. I promise.”

When I returned, Kareel was seated on the couch, so I joined her there, sliding my palms nervously along my thighs, smoothing down the green satin gown. She held out a goblet and I eyed it warily. “You won't let me fall asleep on you?”

I loved to hear her laugh. “No, I promise you'll be awake until it's time for both of us to sleep.”

I hoped that would be far into the night.

~ :: ~

Her taste is still heavy upon my tongue, sweeter than my own juices. I look down at her face, the gravity of her responsibilities eased away ... finally. I feel so proud. I'm the one who has left her sated, serene and soft. I don't think it's a particularly male or female trait to know that you've given your lover as much pleasure as you can.

We had kissed again on the couch while sipping the amber liquid. When we both leaned back, I'd stroked my fingers through her hair and she shivered. I wasn't exactly flying blind as I was hoping many of her responses would be similar to my own.

I stood and whispered, “Come to bed.”

She followed after dimming the lights. We could still see each other clearly because of the starlight from the oval window in the wall beside the bed. We climbed in and drew the thin thermal sheet over our legs, I think more from nervousness than any sense of feeling cold. But I think she appreciated the diversion.

I'd turned to her again and brought her wrist – the bare one - up to my lips. “Through Odan, you know many of the things that I like to do in bed. But I'm thinking that _this_ is something special for you.”

Kareel let out a moan before she could even answer. “Yesssss.”

“Will you let me continue, to find out what else gives you pleasure?”

She raised her eyebrows. “But I don't want to ignore you, Beverly.”

I stroked the back of my hand up her cheek. “We have time to play together later, if you like.”

Kareel nodded with a bit of her natural seriousness. “You are truly a remarkable woman, Beverly.”

I shrugged my shoulders. “I'm surprising even myself, but I may have to agree with you.”

And so I drew her into my arms, remembering that she was both the Odan who had been my lover and also Kareel who had never experienced an intimate touch before in her life.

When she'd fallen asleep, her body was still quivering with the aftershocks. The spasms had been particularly greedy (well, I can't think of a more appropriate term) during her last orgasm. She'd clutched my hand to her breast and hadn't let go. And I'd been dazed. From everything. I'd given her pleasure. I had _felt_ pleasure in giving it to her. And she had returned the gift, showing the enthusiasm of an eager student.

I don't think I'm the same woman since I woke up this morning. Oh, all the molecules are in the right places and my memories intact, but I don't think I'll ever regard love the same way. Deanna said I had to risk pain in order to gain love. Well, I risked all of the unworthy things: uncertainty, fear, stupidity. Especially stupidity. I gaze down at Kareel's peaceful face and wonder who really was the student and who was the teacher. Not that it really matters.

She's stirring awake and my fingers brush over a responsive nipple. “Beverly?” Her voice is laced with amusement, even for the scant syllables of my name.

“Yes, my love?” There. I said it and it came easily to me.

“Will you do that thing again? With your fingers?”

I choke down my rising excitement. She's enticing me. “Inside?”

Kareel bites her lower lip. “Please.”

I'm laughing at her. “You minx.”

She laughs right back at me. “I don't think the Ambassador has ever been called a minx before. Although perhaps that should be privileged information.”

I look thoughtful for a moment. Perhaps that's not what I would have called Teres – for that was the name of the host and my former lover – but Kareel is a minx when given the proper stimulation.

“Agreed. Just between the two of us.”

And then I bend down, intent upon giving her every opportunity to be a minx.

My minx.

My Kareel.

My Odan.

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: Paramount and the spirit of _The Great Bird_ yes; me no. Simple, huh.  
>  Word count: 3,013 (from two other sources)


End file.
